anime court
by Heavenfire Hellfury
Summary: our favorite characters from yu yu, on trail for real (or imagined) crimes. lol and Hiei is first!chapter four up
1. Default Chapter

Anime court Heavenfury: Hi! I'm the author, and this is my courtroom! Oh yeah, I don't own yu yu hakusho or any of the people, but if I did then you would all be sorry!! Bwahahahaha!!!!!!!  
  
Audience: Yaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyy!  
  
Heavenfury: We are here to put anime people on trial for (real or imagined) crimes (mostly imagined). Then when we say they're guilty, we get to punish them. All you fangirls get ready, cause you can make up anything. Soon you'll-  
  
Hiei: What is this?  
  
Heavenfury: a courtroom.  
  
Hiei: what's it for?   
  
Heavenfury: we put people on trial and then we punish them afterwards.  
  
Hiei: really? How do you punish them?  
  
Heavenfury: well, um however we want!! ^---^  
  
Hiei: ^---^ who's the first victim?  
  
Heavenfury: um they're called defendants..  
  
Hiei: hn.  
  
Heavenfury: just go in there and come out when my bailiff tells you to.  
  
Hiei: hn.   
  
Heavenfury: now let me introduce my bailiff, Wolfmoon!!  
  
Wolfmoon: hi everyone!  
  
Heavenfury: okay let's get started!!!   
  
Wolfmoon: all rise, and then sit down again. and I mean it! .  
  
Heavenfury: today we have the trial of the fangirls vs. Hiei. The defendant is accused of first degree B.T.D.H. bailiff, please bring in the victim- I mean, defendant.  
  
Wolfmoon: okay!!!   
  
Hiei: WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING!!!!!!!??????????  
  
Wolfmoon: persecuting you of course^----^  
  
Audience member: don't you mean prosecuting???  
  
Wolfmoon: permission to approach and destroy the whiner, your honor.  
  
Heavenfury: make it quick.  
  
Wolfmoon: I mean what I say, baka.  
  
Hiei: what about me?  
  
Heavenfury: of course. You are accused of B.T.D.H.  
  
Hiei: and what is that?  
  
Heavenfury: bailiff, if you would?  
  
Wolfmoon: Being Too Darn Hot. Duh. =^---^=  
  
Fangirls: Yaaaaayyyyyyyy!!!!!  
  
Heavenfury: for the defense attorney, we have, Yusuke!!  
  
Yusuke: hi everybody! Hi Hiei! I'm your attorney!  
  
Hiei: my what??  
  
Yusuke: I get to defend you and try to convince them that you're not guilty!!^---^  
  
Hiei: oh kami,  
  
Heavenfury: And for the persecutor's attorney, um, Keiko!!  
  
Keiko: How did you get me on this thing???  
  
Heavenfury: I believe my bailiff convinced you.  
  
Keiko: oh yeah. Now I remember. =(  
  
Heavenfury: now, we played Janken before hand so the persecutor may go first.  
  
Keiko: um okay, I call my first witness to the stand. Can Botan come up hear please?  
  
Botan: here I am.  
  
Wolfmoon: do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth unless of course it shows that the victim is innocent, so help you.wait. no never mind. No one can help you if you break those rules. and I mean no one.  
  
Botan: um I do?  
  
Wolfmoon: very good.  
  
Hiei: I think I like that girl  
  
Heavenfury: no flirting in MY courtroom!!!! Now you may proceed.  
  
Keiko: would you please state any relationship you may have with the defendant?  
  
Botan: um, I know him as a co-worker?  
  
Wolfmoon:   
  
Keiko: can you tell us-  
  
Heavenfury: get on with it!! Stop beating around the bush and get on with it!! Botan tell us any evidence you might have to prove Hiei is too hot for his own good.  
  
Botan: well, just the other day he was chased down the road by a pack of girls. And he has a lot of fangirls, almost as many as Kurama.  
  
Keiko: and do you think he is cute?  
  
Botan: umm. well,   
  
Yusuke: objection!!!  
  
Keiko: I object to his objection!!  
  
Heavenfury: you do not have to answer the question.  
  
Wolfmoon: baka lawyer.  
  
Heavenfury: okay everybody out. We'll have a lunch break and then move on. When we come back it's the persecutor's turn again.  
  
Yusuke: hey that's not fair!!  
  
Wolfmoon: do you have a problem Yusuke?  
  
Yusuke: no, not really.  
  
Heavenfury: ahem. As I was saying, if anyone wants to be on the stand review me a came and what side you're on and stuff. I'll figure it out. I also need other crimes for later trials. Please help me!!! I'm only one person!!!  
  
Wolfmoon: and if you don't review, you'll answer to me got it?  
  
Heavenfury: yeahhhh. well thanks for coming see ya later. 


	2. the jury is in

                        Anime court 

Heavenfury: Hi! I'm the author, and this is my courtroom! Oh yeah, I don't own yu yu hakusho or any of the people, but if I did then you would all be sorry!! Bwahahahaha!!!!!!!

Audience: Yaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyy!

Heavenfury: We are here to put anime people on trial for (real or imagined) crimes (mostly imagined). Then when we say they're guilty, we get to punish them. All you fangirls get ready, cause you can make up anything. Soon you'll-

Hiei: What is this?

Heavenfury: a courtroom.

Hiei: what's it for? looking suspicious 

Heavenfury: we put people on trial and then we punish them afterwards.

Hiei: brightening really? How do you punish them?

Heavenfury: well, um however we want!! ^---^

Hiei: ^---^ who's the first victim?

Heavenfury: um they're called defendants….

Hiei: hn.

Heavenfury: just go in there and come out when my bailiff tells you to.

Hiei: hn. Walks away looking suspicious again

Heavenfury: now let me introduce my bailiff, Wolfmoon!!

Wolfmoon: hi everyone! 

Heavenfury: okay let's get started!!! Walks into courtroom in knee high leather boots, white shorts, black tank top, and red vest w/ huge sledgehammer instead of the gavel thingy. 

Wolfmoon: all rise, and then sit down again. wearing black stretchy hiphuggers, white tunic shirt w/red belt and I mean it! waves big battle axe at audience.

Heavenfury: today we have the trial of the fangirls vs. Hiei. The defendant is accused of first degree B.T.D.H. bailiff, please bring in the victim- I mean, defendant.

Wolfmoon: okay!!! runs into side room, drags an unwilling Hiei out, chains him to stand

Hiei: WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING!!!!!!!??????????

Wolfmoon: persecuting you of course^----^

Audience member: don't you mean prosecuting???

Wolfmoon: permission to approach and destroy the whiner, your honor.

Heavenfury: make it quick.

Wolfmoon: runs over to person, slices off random body part I mean what I say, baka.

Hiei: what about me? 

Heavenfury:  of course. You are accused of B.T.D.H.

Hiei: and what is that?

Heavenfury: bailiff, if you would?

Wolfmoon: Being Too Darn Hot. Duh. =^---^=

Fangirls: Yaaaaayyyyyyyy!!!!!

Heavenfury:  for the defense attorney, we have, Yusuke!!

Yusuke: hi everybody! Hi Hiei! I'm your attorney!

Hiei: my what??

Yusuke: I get to defend you and try to convince them that you're not guilty!!^---^

Hiei: oh kami,

Heavenfury: And for the persecutor's attorney, um, Keiko!!

Keiko: How did you get me on this thing???

Heavenfury: I believe my bailiff convinced you.

Keiko: oh yeah. Now I remember. =(

Heavenfury: now, we played Janken before hand so the persecutor may go first.

Keiko: um okay, I call my first witness to the stand. Can Botan come up hear please?

Botan: looking nervous here I am.

Wolfmoon: do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth unless of course it shows that the victim is innocent, so help you…wait… no never mind. No one can help you if you break those rules. Brandishes battle-axe and I mean no one.

Botan: um I do?

Wolfmoon: smiles wickedly very good.

Hiei: I think I like that girl

Heavenfury: swings sledgehammer no flirting in MY courtroom!!!! Now you may proceed.

Keiko: would you please state any relationship you may have with the defendant?

Botan: um, I know him as a co-worker?

Wolfmoon: nods 

Keiko: can you tell us-

Heavenfury: get on with it!! Stop beating around the bush and get on with it!! Botan tell us any evidence you might have to prove Hiei is too hot for his own good.

Botan: well, just the other day he was chased down the road by a pack of girls. And he has a lot of fangirls, almost as many as Kurama. 

Keiko: evil smile and do you think he is cute?

Botan: uncomfortable fidget umm… well,  ~ 

Yusuke: objection!!!

Keiko: I object to his objection!!

Heavenfury: sigh you do not have to answer the question.

Wolfmoon: glares at Yusuke baka lawyer.

Heavenfury: okay everybody out. We'll have a lunch break and then move on. When we come back it's the persecutor's turn again.

Yusuke: hey that's not fair!!

Wolfmoon: waves battle-axe around do you have a problem Yusuke? 

Yusuke: very small voice no, not really…

Heavenfury: ahem. As I was saying, if anyone wants to be on the stand review me a came and what side you're on and stuff. I'll figure it out. I also need other crimes for later trials. Please help me!!! I'm only one person!!!

Wolfmoon: and if you don't review, you'll answer to me raises axe got it?

Heavenfury: yeahhhh… well thanks for coming see ya later.

CHAPTER 2

Hi! First off, I would like to apologize for the mistake I made uploading Mechanical Encounters as the second chapter…looks embarrassed sorry bout that people, won't happen again. Second, thank you soooo much for all the reviews on this. I was so happy! You all were sooo nice! Except, how did I make Kurama a baka? I just don't get it. Oh well. Here we go.

Heavenfury: Konichiwa!!now has a broadsword instead of sledgehammer Today we have a new character. She is our new judge. Wolfmoon and I will be the bailiff. Our new judge's name is Plum, cause; I had lack of a better name. She should be here any minute now…

Plum: walks in wearing lavender shirt, purple flares, purple shoes, hair pulled into a ponytail hi everyone! Flops down on a lounge chair covered in fluffy pillows and other comfy stuff this is my judge's bench?

Heavenfury: Yes! And we have a present for you. Hands a big package to her that looks like a drunken monkey wrapped it. For you!

Plum: squeals and unwraps it. Wrapping paper flies everywhere. Plum begins to dance around holding a shiny new rocket launcher Yaaayyyyy!!!!!!! I've always wanted one of these. points to Hiei still wrapped in chains who is that?

Yusuke: don't tell me. She's completely clueless about anime in general, yu yu hakusho in particular, and has no idea what this trial is about.

Heavenfury: how did you guess? ^---^

Wolfmoon: I wonder…anyway, Plum, he's the victim/defendant. The one with too much hair gel is Yusuke, Hiei's defense attorney. The brunette over therepoints to Keiko is Keiko. She is the persecution's attorney. 

Plum: sounds good to me.

Heavenfury: Wolfmoon and I are the bailiff, you're the judge, and all of us are the jury.

Plum: only three of us?

Yusuke: don't question. It's very, very dangerous. People have been maimed in here.

Plum: well then they deserved it.

Audience, Yusuke, Keiko, and Hiei: sweatdrop 

Heavenfury: now you see why we are friends. Let the games begin!!!!!!!

Plum: okay, Keiko, it's your turn. 

Keiko: for my next witless,

Yusuke: don't you mean witness?

Keiko: no. Witless. Trust me. Now, the next witless is Kuwabara!

Kuwabara struts in, takes the stand yes I swear, promise, etc. get on with it.

Heavenfury: to Wolfmoon you want to?

Wolfmoon: no, you can.  

Heavenfury: hits Kuwabara over the head with hilt of sword I have always wanted to do that.

Wolfmoon: it's my turn next. 

Keiko; anyway, Kuwabara, give us your evidence.

Plum: hey, she's catching on.

Kuwabara: yeah. I don't see how he's all that good looking. He's short, and has weird hair and has no fashion sense.

Wolfmoon and Heavenfury: DIE YAROU!! Jumps at Kuwabara with weapons out

Plum: stop!! Shoots rocket launcher in random directions that's better. ^---0smoke clears, pieces of what's left of the walls fall into the holes in the floor everyone is frozen in place now, no killing the witlesses. No matter how much they irritate you.

Everyonetwitch gulp

Plum: looks over at Heavenfury have we got enough evidence yet?

Heavenfury: Yup! We have plenty.

Yusuke: wait, how did Kuwabara help Keiko's point at all?

Heavenfury: well everyone knows that Kuwabara hates Hiei, and that he is quite stupid.

Yusuke: so?

Wolfmoon: so since he's so stupid, whatever he says, especially about Hiei, has to be wrong. Duh.

Plum: yeah. Even I knew that. Okay, to the jury room.

All three go to a room that looks like a living room straight out of a mansion, and sit down

Heavenfury: I'd call for pizza, but I know this won't take long. I say Hiei is guilty.

Wolfmoon: oh yeah. How about you Plum?

Plum: no.

Wolfmoon and Heavenfury: WHAT!!!!???????

Plum: he's not guilty.

Wolfmoon: this girl has problems. 

Heavenfury: yup. I guess we'll just have to use an alternative method.

Wolfmoon: you mean-?

Heavenfury: exactly. Plum, this is for the good of the court. And my sanity.

Wolfmoon: hits Plum over the head with a nearby mallet, ties her up and hides her behind one of the various curtains that cover the walls there. Let's go.

Heavenfury: okay. Sorry bout that Plum!runs out of room after Wolfmoon

Back in courtroom 

Heavenfury: the judge is temporarily, uh, missing, and so I'll take over for her. The defendant is pronounced guilty as charged by a total decision, and so next time we will decide his punishment, but for now… bring on the next case!!!

Wolfmoon: the next case is Yusuke versus various tough guys.

Heavenfury: well, we'll be here next time, thanks for waiting; it took longer than I thought to get this up, technical difficulties with my computer and stuff. 


	3. wrong ideas and terrible punishments

                        Anime court 

Heavenfury: Hi! I'm the author, and this is my courtroom! Oh yeah, I don't own yu yu hakusho or any of the people, but if I did then you would all be sorry!! Bwahahahaha!!!!!!!

Audience: Yaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyy!

Heavenfury: We are here to put anime people on trial for (real or imagined) crimes (mostly imagined). Then when we say they're guilty, we get to punish them. All you fangirls get ready, cause you can make up anything. Soon you'll-

Hiei: What is this?

Heavenfury: a courtroom.

Hiei: what's it for? looking suspicious 

Heavenfury: we put people on trial and then we punish them afterwards.

Hiei: brightening really? How do you punish them?

Heavenfury: well, um however we want!! ^---^

Hiei: ^---^ who's the first victim?

Heavenfury: um they're called defendants….

Hiei: hn.

Heavenfury: just go in there and come out when my bailiff tells you to.

Hiei: hn. Walks away looking suspicious again

Heavenfury: now let me introduce my bailiff, Wolfmoon!!

Wolfmoon: hi everyone! 

Heavenfury: okay let's get started!!! Walks into courtroom in knee high leather boots, white shorts, black tank top, and red vest w/ huge sledgehammer instead of the gavel thingy. 

Wolfmoon: all rise, and then sit down again. wearing black stretchy hiphuggers, white tunic shirt w/red belt and I mean it! waves big battle axe at audience.

Heavenfury: today we have the trial of the fangirls vs. Hiei. The defendant is accused of first degree B.T.D.H. bailiff, please bring in the victim- I mean, defendant.

Wolfmoon: okay!!! runs into side room, drags an unwilling Hiei out, chains him to stand

Hiei: WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING!!!!!!!??????????

Wolfmoon: persecuting you of course^----^

Audience member: don't you mean prosecuting???

Wolfmoon: permission to approach and destroy the whiner, your honor.

Heavenfury: make it quick.

Wolfmoon: runs over to person, slices off random body part I mean what I say, baka.

Hiei: what about me? 

Heavenfury:  of course. You are accused of B.T.D.H.

Hiei: and what is that?

Heavenfury: bailiff, if you would?

Wolfmoon: Being Too Darn Hot. Duh. =^---^=

Fangirls: Yaaaaayyyyyyyy!!!!!

Heavenfury:  for the defense attorney, we have, Yusuke!!

Yusuke: hi everybody! Hi Hiei! I'm your attorney!

Hiei: my what??

Yusuke: I get to defend you and try to convince them that you're not guilty!!^---^

Hiei: oh kami,

Heavenfury: And for the persecutor's attorney, um, Keiko!!

Keiko: How did you get me on this thing???

Heavenfury: I believe my bailiff convinced you.

Keiko: oh yeah. Now I remember. =(

Heavenfury: now, we played Janken before hand so the persecutor may go first.

Keiko: um okay, I call my first witness to the stand. Can Botan come up hear please?

Botan: looking nervous here I am.

Wolfmoon: do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth unless of course it shows that the victim is innocent, so help you…wait… no never mind. No one can help you if you break those rules. Brandishes battle-axe and I mean no one.

Botan: um I do?

Wolfmoon: smiles wickedly very good.

Hiei: I think I like that girl

Heavenfury: swings sledgehammer no flirting in MY courtroom!!!! Now you may proceed.

Keiko: would you please state any relationship you may have with the defendant?

Botan: um, I know him as a co-worker?

Wolfmoon: nods 

Keiko: can you tell us-

Heavenfury: get on with it!! Stop beating around the bush and get on with it!! Botan tell us any evidence you might have to prove Hiei is too hot for his own good.

Botan: well, just the other day he was chased down the road by a pack of girls. And he has a lot of fangirls, almost as many as Kurama. 

Keiko: evil smile and do you think he is cute?

Botan: uncomfortable fidget umm… well,  ~ 

Yusuke: objection!!!

Keiko: I object to his objection!!

Heavenfury: sigh you do not have to answer the question.

Wolfmoon: glares at Yusuke baka lawyer.

Heavenfury: okay everybody out. We'll have a lunch break and then move on. When we come back it's the persecutor's turn again.

Yusuke: hey that's not fair!!

Wolfmoon: waves battle-axe around do you have a problem Yusuke? 

Yusuke: very small voice no, not really…

Heavenfury: ahem. As I was saying, if anyone wants to be on the stand review me a came and what side you're on and stuff. I'll figure it out. I also need other crimes for later trials. Please help me!!! I'm only one person!!!

Wolfmoon: and if you don't review, you'll answer to me raises axe got it?

Heavenfury: yeahhhh… well thanks for coming see ya later.

CHAPTER 2

Hi! First off, I would like to apologize for the mistake I made uploading Mechanical Encounters as the second chapter…looks embarrassed sorry bout that people, won't happen again. Second, thank you soooo much for all the reviews on this. I was so happy! You all were sooo nice! Except, how did I make Kurama a baka? I just don't get it. Oh well. Here we go.

Heavenfury: Konichiwa!!now has a broadsword instead of sledgehammer Today we have a new character. She is our new judge. Wolfmoon and I will be the bailiff. Our new judge's name is Plum, cause; I had lack of a better name. She should be here any minute now…

Plum: walks in wearing lavender shirt, purple flares, purple shoes, hair pulled into a ponytail hi everyone! Flops down on a lounge chair covered in fluffy pillows and other comfy stuff this is my judge's bench?

Heavenfury: Yes! And we have a present for you. Hands a big package to her that looks like a drunken monkey wrapped it. For you!

Plum: squeals and unwraps it. Wrapping paper flies everywhere. Plum begins to dance around holding a shiny new rocket launcher Yaaayyyyy!!!!!!! I've always wanted one of these. points to Hiei still wrapped in chains who is that?

Yusuke: don't tell me. She's completely clueless about anime in general, yu yu hakusho in particular, and has no idea what this trial is about.

Heavenfury: how did you guess? ^---^

Wolfmoon: I wonder…anyway, Plum, he's the victim/defendant. The one with too much hair gel is Yusuke, Hiei's defense attorney. The brunette over therepoints to Keiko is Keiko. She is the persecution's attorney. 

Plum: sounds good to me.

Heavenfury: Wolfmoon and I are the bailiff, you're the judge, and all of us are the jury.

Plum: only three of us?

Yusuke: don't question. It's very, very dangerous. People have been maimed in here.

Plum: well then they deserved it.

Audience, Yusuke, Keiko, and Hiei: sweatdrop 

Heavenfury: now you see why we are friends. Let the games begin!!!!!!!

Plum: okay, Keiko, it's your turn. 

Keiko: for my next witless,

Yusuke: don't you mean witness?

Keiko: no. Witless. Trust me. Now, the next witless is Kuwabara!

Kuwabara struts in, takes the stand yes I swear, promise, etc. get on with it.

Heavenfury: to Wolfmoon you want to?

Wolfmoon: no, you can.  

Heavenfury: hits Kuwabara over the head with hilt of sword I have always wanted to do that.

Wolfmoon: it's my turn next. 

Keiko; anyway, Kuwabara, give us your evidence.

Plum: hey, she's catching on.

Kuwabara: yeah. I don't see how he's all that good looking. He's short, and has weird hair and has no fashion sense.

Wolfmoon and Heavenfury: DIE YAROU!! Jumps at Kuwabara with weapons out

Plum: stop!! Shoots rocket launcher in random directions that's better. ^---0smoke clears, pieces of what's left of the walls fall into the holes in the floor everyone is frozen in place now, no killing the witlesses. No matter how much they irritate you.

Everyonetwitch gulp

Plum: looks over at Heavenfury have we got enough evidence yet?

Heavenfury: Yup! We have plenty.

Yusuke: wait, how did Kuwabara help Keiko's point at all?

Heavenfury: well everyone knows that Kuwabara hates Hiei, and that he is quite stupid.

Yusuke: so?

Wolfmoon: so since he's so stupid, whatever he says, especially about Hiei, has to be wrong. Duh.

Plum: yeah. Even I knew that. Okay, to the jury room.

All three go to a room that looks like a living room straight out of a mansion, and sit down

Heavenfury: I'd call for pizza, but I know this won't take long. I say Hiei is guilty.

Wolfmoon: oh yeah. How about you Plum?

Plum: no.

Wolfmoon and Heavenfury: WHAT!!!!???????

Plum: he's not guilty.

Wolfmoon: this girl has problems. 

Heavenfury: yup. I guess we'll just have to use an alternative method.

Wolfmoon: you mean-?

Heavenfury: exactly. Plum, this is for the good of the court. And my sanity.

Wolfmoon: hits Plum over the head with a nearby mallet, ties her up and hides her behind one of the various curtains that cover the walls there. Let's go.

Heavenfury: okay. Sorry bout that Plum!runs out of room after Wolfmoon

Back in courtroom 

Heavenfury: the judge is temporarily, uh, missing, and so I'll take over for her. The defendant is pronounced guilty as charged by a total decision, and so next time we will decide his punishment, but for now… bring on the next case!!!

Wolfmoon: the next case is Yusuke versus various tough guys.

Heavenfury: well, we'll be here next time, thanks for waiting; it took longer than I thought to get this up, technical difficulties with my computer and stuff. 

Chapter 3

Wrong Ideas and Terrible Punishments

Heavenfury: Hi!!!!!!!! How is everyone? Gomen Nai about the long long long long wait. It has been… hectic. So on with the show shall we? Today we will face the wrath of a pissed of Plum, punish Hiei, and find out there was a huge mistake in the last chapter. So let's go shall we? Flings open huge doors to the new courtroom because Plum destroyed the last one in today's schedule we have… uh… bailiff? Where are you bailiff? 

Wolfmoon: Over here.

Heavenfury: what are you doing?

Wolfmoon: subduing the guilty person.

Heavenfury: oh yeah, we have to punish him now, don't we? Big huge smile

Wolfmoon: Yes! Another big hugely huge smile

Hiei: nooooooooo!! Wait…what's the punishment?

Heavenfury: we sentence you to… being Chibi-ized! Then we will glue you to a base and make you into a statue trophy! 

Wolfmoon: yay I love statuary!!! Drags out a large machine with many many buttons and flashing lights Come 'ere you. Grabs Hiei, and Heavenfury and Wolfmoon shove him into a pose, and shoves him into the machine there!

Heavenfury:  on other side of machine he's sooo cute!!!!!! Holds up little chibi Hiei, posed like he's just about to run forward to attack oh, I love it! Places him on a pedestal next to the judge's couch there, perfect.  

Wolfmoon: Okay! Now we need to get o with our next case. This one about Yusuke is just stupid. Can we get on to the next one?

Heavenfury: and that case is…?

Wolfmoon: Kurama vs. the Fangirls

Heavenfury: hmmm. Sounds interesting. Bring them in. 

Kuramaruns in, yelling things like getting them off me" and "making them stop!" 

Fangirls: run in screaming like the rabid fangirls they are

Heavenfury: okay, now everyone needs to settle down. Raises a whip with a glowing axe on the end and I mean it!

Wolfmoon: yeah! Now all of you SHUT UP!!! Receives glare from Heavenfury please. 

Kurama: I'm my own persecution attorney, so can we please get on with it?

Fangirls: sounding very unhappy but Kurama we only swarmed your house twice!

Wolfmoon: wow Kurama you're really hasty aren't you? Normally you'd be much more calm.

Kurama: well I'm desperate. 

Fangirls: this is _our_ defense attorney. Shoves forward short dirty-blond haired girl her name is Kitty. Notice the cute ears and tail! Turns her around in circles 

Heavenfury: to Wolfmoon these girls are _very very_ strange.

Wolfmoon: I think they need to cool down, don't you? 

Heavenfury: I forgot about that! What a good idea! Go ahead.

Wolfmoon: pulls a hidden lever, large bucket of water materializes above the fangirls' heads and dumps a couple gallons of water on them hehehehehe

Fangirls: ahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!! WET!

Kitty: ahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!! WET! I'm melting!!!!!!!! Looks at herself hey whadda ya know! I'm not melting! Yay!

Heavenfury: ooookaaayyyy? @@ yeah. Well, let's get on with this. I want this group of creatures out of my courtroom soon. Persecution goes first.

Kurama: I accuse these girls of stalking me excessively, invading my personal space a million too many times, and not knowing that I need my clothing if I'm to go anywhere at all.

Wolfmoon: Explain that last comment?

Kurama: they took my clothes. Twice. Out of my house, and of me while I was in  the mall.

Wolfmoon: well, once is excusable, but twice is a little much.

Heavenfury: shifty eyes do you have proof of this alleged clothes-theft? 

Courtroom People: big huge stare

Heavenfury: well it's a understandable question…shifty eyes

Wolfmoon: going red yeah, do you have proof?

Kurama: Well, I'm wearing borrowed clothes, and I haven't gone anywhere for the last two weeks.

Kitty: You're here aren't you? That's somewhere isn't it?

Kurama: glares at her except here of course.

Kitty: you should have said so!

Heavenfury: stop. That is an unfounded claim. It is clear to me they are innocent of the last claim.shoves some large something behind the judge's couch 

Kurama: what's that?

Wolfmoon: nothing. We need to go now but we'll be back soon. Bye!


	4. random insanity

                        Anime court 

Heavenfury: Hi! I'm the author, and this is my courtroom! Oh yeah, I don't own yu yu hakusho or any of the people, but if I did then you would all be sorry!! Bwahahahaha!!!!!!!

Audience: Yaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyy!

Heavenfury: We are here to put anime people on trial for (real or imagined) crimes (mostly imagined). Then when we say they're guilty, we get to punish them. All you fangirls get ready, cause you can make up anything. Soon you'll-

Hiei: What is this?

Heavenfury: a courtroom.

Hiei: what's it for? looking suspicious 

Heavenfury: we put people on trial and then we punish them afterwards.

Hiei: brightening really? How do you punish them?

Heavenfury: well, um however we want!! ^---^

Hiei: ^---^ who's the first victim?

Heavenfury: um they're called defendants….

Hiei: hn.

Heavenfury: just go in there and come out when my bailiff tells you to.

Hiei: hn. Walks away looking suspicious again

Heavenfury: now let me introduce my bailiff, Wolfmoon!!

Wolfmoon: hi everyone! 

Heavenfury: okay let's get started!!! Walks into courtroom in knee high leather boots, white shorts, black tank top, and red vest w/ huge sledgehammer instead of the gavel thingy. 

Wolfmoon: all rise, and then sit down again. wearing black stretchy hiphuggers, white tunic shirt w/red belt and I mean it! waves big battle axe at audience.

Heavenfury: today we have the trial of the fangirls vs. Hiei. The defendant is accused of first degree B.T.D.H. bailiff, please bring in the victim- I mean, defendant.

Wolfmoon: okay!!! runs into side room, drags an unwilling Hiei out, chains him to stand

Hiei: WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING!!!!!!!??????????

Wolfmoon: persecuting you of course^----^

Audience member: don't you mean prosecuting???

Wolfmoon: permission to approach and destroy the whiner, your honor.

Heavenfury: make it quick.

Wolfmoon: runs over to person, slices off random body part I mean what I say, baka.

Hiei: what about me? 

Heavenfury:  of course. You are accused of B.T.D.H.

Hiei: and what is that?

Heavenfury: bailiff, if you would?

Wolfmoon: Being Too Darn Hot. Duh. =^---^=

Fangirls: Yaaaaayyyyyyyy!!!!!

Heavenfury:  for the defense attorney, we have, Yusuke!!

Yusuke: hi everybody! Hi Hiei! I'm your attorney!

Hiei: my what??

Yusuke: I get to defend you and try to convince them that you're not guilty!!^---^

Hiei: oh kami,

Heavenfury: And for the persecutor's attorney, um, Keiko!!

Keiko: How did you get me on this thing???

Heavenfury: I believe my bailiff convinced you.

Keiko: oh yeah. Now I remember. =(

Heavenfury: now, we played Janken before hand so the persecutor may go first.

Keiko: um okay, I call my first witness to the stand. Can Botan come up hear please?

Botan: looking nervous here I am.

Wolfmoon: do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth unless of course it shows that the victim is innocent, so help you…wait… no never mind. No one can help you if you break those rules. Brandishes battle-axe and I mean no one.

Botan: um I do?

Wolfmoon: smiles wickedly very good.

Hiei: I think I like that girl

Heavenfury: swings sledgehammer no flirting in MY courtroom!!!! Now you may proceed.

Keiko: would you please state any relationship you may have with the defendant?

Botan: um, I know him as a co-worker?

Wolfmoon: nods 

Keiko: can you tell us-

Heavenfury: get on with it!! Stop beating around the bush and get on with it!! Botan tell us any evidence you might have to prove Hiei is too hot for his own good.

Botan: well, just the other day he was chased down the road by a pack of girls. And he has a lot of fangirls, almost as many as Kurama. 

Keiko: evil smile and do you think he is cute?

Botan: uncomfortable fidget umm… well,  ~ 

Yusuke: objection!!!

Keiko: I object to his objection!!

Heavenfury: sigh you do not have to answer the question.

Wolfmoon: glares at Yusuke baka lawyer.

Heavenfury: okay everybody out. We'll have a lunch break and then move on. When we come back it's the persecutor's turn again.

Yusuke: hey that's not fair!!

Wolfmoon: waves battle-axe around do you have a problem Yusuke? 

Yusuke: very small voice no, not really…

Heavenfury: ahem. As I was saying, if anyone wants to be on the stand review me a came and what side you're on and stuff. I'll figure it out. I also need other crimes for later trials. Please help me!!! I'm only one person!!!

Wolfmoon: and if you don't review, you'll answer to me raises axe got it?

Heavenfury: yeahhhh… well thanks for coming see ya later.

CHAPTER 2

Hi! First off, I would like to apologize for the mistake I made uploading Mechanical Encounters as the second chapter…looks embarrassed sorry bout that people, won't happen again. Second, thank you soooo much for all the reviews on this. I was so happy! You all were sooo nice! Except, how did I make Kurama a baka? I just don't get it. Oh well. Here we go.

Heavenfury: Konichiwa!!now has a broadsword instead of sledgehammer Today we have a new character. She is our new judge. Wolfmoon and I will be the bailiff. Our new judge's name is Plum, cause; I had lack of a better name. She should be here any minute now…

Plum: walks in wearing lavender shirt, purple flares, purple shoes, hair pulled into a ponytail hi everyone! Flops down on a lounge chair covered in fluffy pillows and other comfy stuff this is my judge's bench?

Heavenfury: Yes! And we have a present for you. Hands a big package to her that looks like a drunken monkey wrapped it. For you!

Plum: squeals and unwraps it. Wrapping paper flies everywhere. Plum begins to dance around holding a shiny new rocket launcher Yaaayyyyy!!!!!!! I've always wanted one of these. points to Hiei still wrapped in chains who is that?

Yusuke: don't tell me. She's completely clueless about anime in general, yu yu hakusho in particular, and has no idea what this trial is about.

Heavenfury: how did you guess? ^---^

Wolfmoon: I wonder…anyway, Plum, he's the victim/defendant. The one with too much hair gel is Yusuke, Hiei's defense attorney. The brunette over therepoints to Keiko is Keiko. She is the persecution's attorney. 

Plum: sounds good to me.

Heavenfury: Wolfmoon and I are the bailiff, you're the judge, and all of us are the jury.

Plum: only three of us?

Yusuke: don't question. It's very, very dangerous. People have been maimed in here.

Plum: well then they deserved it.

Audience, Yusuke, Keiko, and Hiei: sweatdrop 

Heavenfury: now you see why we are friends. Let the games begin!!!!!!!

Plum: okay, Keiko, it's your turn. 

Keiko: for my next witless,

Yusuke: don't you mean witness?

Keiko: no. Witless. Trust me. Now, the next witless is Kuwabara!

Kuwabara struts in, takes the stand yes I swear, promise, etc. get on with it.

Heavenfury: to Wolfmoon you want to?

Wolfmoon: no, you can.  

Heavenfury: hits Kuwabara over the head with hilt of sword I have always wanted to do that.

Wolfmoon: it's my turn next. 

Keiko; anyway, Kuwabara, give us your evidence.

Plum: hey, she's catching on.

Kuwabara: yeah. I don't see how he's all that good looking. He's short, and has weird hair and has no fashion sense.

Wolfmoon and Heavenfury: DIE YAROU!! Jumps at Kuwabara with weapons out

Plum: stop!! Shoots rocket launcher in random directions that's better. ^---0smoke clears, pieces of what's left of the walls fall into the holes in the floor everyone is frozen in place now, no killing the witlesses. No matter how much they irritate you.

Everyonetwitch gulp

Plum: looks over at Heavenfury have we got enough evidence yet?

Heavenfury: Yup! We have plenty.

Yusuke: wait, how did Kuwabara help Keiko's point at all?

Heavenfury: well everyone knows that Kuwabara hates Hiei, and that he is quite stupid.

Yusuke: so?

Wolfmoon: so since he's so stupid, whatever he says, especially about Hiei, has to be wrong. Duh.

Plum: yeah. Even I knew that. Okay, to the jury room.

All three go to a room that looks like a living room straight out of a mansion, and sit down

Heavenfury: I'd call for pizza, but I know this won't take long. I say Hiei is guilty.

Wolfmoon: oh yeah. How about you Plum?

Plum: no.

Wolfmoon and Heavenfury: WHAT!!!!???????

Plum: he's not guilty.

Wolfmoon: this girl has problems. 

Heavenfury: yup. I guess we'll just have to use an alternative method.

Wolfmoon: you mean-?

Heavenfury: exactly. Plum, this is for the good of the court. And my sanity.

Wolfmoon: hits Plum over the head with a nearby mallet, ties her up and hides her behind one of the various curtains that cover the walls there. Let's go.

Heavenfury: okay. Sorry bout that Plum!runs out of room after Wolfmoon

Back in courtroom 

Heavenfury: the judge is temporarily, uh, missing, and so I'll take over for her. The defendant is pronounced guilty as charged by a total decision, and so next time we will decide his punishment, but for now… bring on the next case!!!

Wolfmoon: the next case is Yusuke versus various tough guys.

Heavenfury: well, we'll be here next time, thanks for waiting; it took longer than I thought to get this up, technical difficulties with my computer and stuff. 

Chapter 3

Wrong Ideas and Terrible Punishments

Heavenfury: Hi!!!!!!!! How is everyone? Gomen Nasai about the long long long long wait. It has been… hectic. So on with the show shall we? Today we will face the wrath of a pissed of Plum, punish Hiei, and find out there was a huge mistake in the last chapter. So let's go shall we? Flings open huge doors to the new courtroom because Plum destroyed the last one in today's schedule we have… uh… bailiff? Where are you bailiff? 

Wolfmoon: Over here.

Heavenfury: what are you doing?

Wolfmoon: subduing the guilty person.

Heavenfury: oh yeah, we have to punish him now, don't we? Big huge smile

Wolfmoon: Yes! Another big hugely huge smile

Hiei: nooooooooo!! Wait…what's the punishment?

Heavenfury: we sentence you to… being Chibi-ized! Then we will glue you to a base and make you into a statue trophy! 

Wolfmoon: yay I love statuary!!! Drags out a large machine with many many buttons and flashing lights Come 'ere you. Grabs Hiei, and Heavenfury and Wolfmoon shove him into a pose, and shoves him into the machine there!

Heavenfury:  on other side of machine he's sooo cute!!!!!! Holds up little chibi Hiei, posed like he's just about to run forward to attack oh, I love it! Places him on a pedestal next to the judge's couch there, perfect.  

Wolfmoon: Okay! Now we need to get o with our next case. This one about Yusuke is just stupid. Can we get on to the next one?

Heavenfury: and that case is…?

Wolfmoon: Kurama vs. the Fangirls

Heavenfury: hmmm. Sounds interesting. Bring them in. 

Kuramaruns in, yelling things like getting them off me" and "making them stop!" 

Fangirls: run in screaming like the rabid fangirls they are

Heavenfury: okay, now everyone needs to settle down. Raises a whip with a glowing axe on the end and I mean it!

Wolfmoon: yeah! Now all of you SHUT UP!!! Receives glare from Heavenfury please. 

Kurama: I'm my own persecution attorney, so can we please get on with it?

Fangirls: sounding very unhappy but Kurama we only swarmed your house twice!

Wolfmoon: wow Kurama you're really hasty aren't you? Normally you'd be much more calm.

Kurama: well I'm desperate. 

Fangirls: this is _our_ defense attorney. Shoves forward short dirty-blond haired girl her name is Kitty. Notice the cute ears and tail! Turns her around in circles 

Heavenfury: to Wolfmoon these girls are _very very_ strange.

Wolfmoon: I think they need to cool down, don't you? 

Heavenfury: I forgot about that! What a good idea! Go ahead.

Wolfmoon: pulls a hidden lever, large bucket of water materializes above the fangirls' heads and dumps a couple gallons of water on them hehehehehe

Fangirls: ahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!! WET!

Kitty: ahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!! WET! I'm melting!!!!!!!! Looks at herself hey whadda ya know! I'm not melting! Yay!

Heavenfury: ooookaaayyyy? @@ yeah. Well, let's get on with this. I want this group of creatures out of my courtroom soon. Persecution goes first.

Kurama: I accuse these girls of stalking me excessively, invading my personal space a million too many times, and not knowing that I need my clothing if I'm to go anywhere at all.

Wolfmoon: Explain that last comment?

Kurama: they took my clothes. Twice. Out of my house, and of me while I was in  the mall.

Wolfmoon: well, once is excusable, but twice is a little much.

Heavenfury: shifty eyes do you have proof of this alleged clothes-theft? 

Courtroom People: big huge stare

Heavenfury: well it's a understandable question…shifty eyes

Wolfmoon: going red yeah, do you have proof?

Kurama: Well, I'm wearing borrowed clothes, and I haven't gone anywhere for the last two weeks.

Kitty: You're here aren't you? That's somewhere isn't it?

Kurama: glares at her except here of course.

Kitty: you should have said so!

Heavenfury: stop. That is an unfounded claim. It is clear to me they are innocent of the last claim.shoves some large something behind the judge's couch 

Kurama: what's that?

Wolfmoon: nothing. We need to go now but we'll be back soon. Bye!

Chapter 4

Heavenfury: sorry about how short the last one was. I was running out of time, and still had to upload this so I had to cut it much shorter than I would have liked. But never fear. Here's another chappy for you, my loyal readers *runs around happily* you see I am lacking in sleep. And the extra sugar doesn't help any. Please excuse any typos in this chapter. My finger is squashed and really hurts. But I'm still typing. I don't know if that makes me stupid or determined. Probably stupid. Oh well. On with the show. Now the defendants may start because, uh, why are they first?

Wolfmoon: to make us seem more fair. And because we are running out of ideas in yu yu and so we will soon pull people from other shows if we don't get ideas. Of course brandishes battle-axe if people would review with ideas then we wouldn't have this problem.

Hiei Statuary: I'm gonna kill youin really tiny voice

Heavenfury: how cute, he can still talk! Squeals and cuddles Hiei how utterly adorable!

Plum: oh Heavenfury, would you like to explain something to me? 

Heavenfury: drops Hiei oh, Plum, hi! Whatcha doing? I thought you, uh, left?

Plum: no actually someone tied me up behind a curtain. Now I need to repay them.

Heavenfury: uh yeah, well it's good you're back, we need our judge and soon I'll help you find the person who did that, okay, let's go!

Plum: starts laughing well that was slick. Sarcastically Okay I forgive you. Who are these people?

Everyone: face fault

Wolfmoon: get it together! The red headed hotly gets a little dreamy is Kurama. Snaps back to normal self the girls are the defendants and they are accused of stalking and invading personal space. A lot.

Plum: and why would they do that?

Fangirls: togethercause he's so hot!!!!!

Plum: oh. Uh, okay. Well, you said it's the freaks, I mean; fangirls turn. Let's get on with it.

All fangirls in entire courtroom: group glare grrrrrr.

Heavenfury: there's nothing wrong with being a fangirl!

Plum: yeah. Whatever. Let's get on with it.

Kitty: sticks out tongue well, we have stalked him, but not a lot.

Plum: how much is 'not a lot'?

Kitty: oh only two or three times a week…looks down at fingernails with feigned interest, fangirls clear throats and shift uneasily, some eyes mist over with memories of those happy days

Plum: uh…

Heavenfury and Wolfmoon: discussing quietly together that sounds reasonable…yeah that's not a lot… I've done much more than that all on my own… not guilty. Definitely…

Plum: interrupting HELLO! Could we please decide that later?

 H and W: okay.

Plum. Okay and what about invading personal space? 

Kitty: uh… not…a lot?

Plum: big glare 

Kitty: I plead the fifth?

Plum: oh well… I think that probably ends this case… let's go in you two…

Heavenfury and Wolfmoon:  sitting together cooing over the chibi-ized Hiei obviously oblivious to the world

Plum: can we please stay on track?

Heavenfury and Wolfmoon: still totally oblivious

Plum: grabs rocket launcher you two don't get away from him, and I'll blow it to bits.

Entire court: gasp

Heavenfury and Wolfmoon: run into the deliberation room faster than they have ever run in their lives ahhh!

Plum: wonderfulsaunters into room after the two crazies

As soon as the door is shut behind her the fangirls group glomp Kurama, cartoon dust cloud and stars, lots of squeals (from the fangirls) and cries for help (from Kurama). 

In deliberation room…again…

Plum: well it's obvious they're guilty…

Heavenfury: oh yeah. 

Wolfmoon: for the sake of sanity…I vote yes.

 Plum: what do you mean?

Wolfmoon: oh, well, just it's not that bad…

Heavenfury: true…

Plum: you two are nuts! Fine what do you suggest we do to punish them… any ideas?

No response

Plum: fine. I will be forced to punish them then…scene fades to black with Plum rubbing hands together in glee, pondering what evil retribution she will put on the guilty fangirls… cue evil, foreboding music

Yay! Another chapter is complete. And for two sittings, I still don't know how much I like this one. Huh, well now the obligatory session of begging for reviews, which I have somehow neglected these past chapters. Now…clears throat please please please please send me reviews. I need something I can work with or I'll be forced to make this a crossover and I don't want to do that yet. I'm sure there are many more crimes to be found but my genius isn't enough. Please! Okay that's all. Oh yeah and uh, I don't own any of this. Hehehehehe kinda forgot that the last few times… bye-bye!


	5. New punishments

Chapter, the next: Hi! Miss me much? I got a little side-tracked., but now I'm back. So I don't own any of this and that about covers it.  
  
Large Battles in the Court and Cruel and/or Unusual Punishment  
  
Plum, Heavenfury, and Wolfmoon walk out of the deliberation room, Plum positively glowing. All take their places and Plum begins to speak until they realize no one is listening to her.  
  
Plum: What is going on here?!  
  
Heavenfury: Well, it looks a lot like the fangirls have tied Kurama up and are now holding some kind of weird ritual. But I could be wrong.  
  
Wolfmoon: No, it looks like your right.  
  
Plum: I'll have no rituals, weird or otherwise, in my courtroom! Wades into the mass of fangirls, throwing people left and right. Private bets start being placed on whether or not she'll come back out.   
  
Heavenfury: What's she's doing now? Holding a pair of binoculars  
  
Wolfmoon: I think she's dragging Kurama out, but I can't tell exactly. There's too many fangirls.  
  
Plum: tears out of the pack and reaches her bazooka, which has been safely stored nearby I hold you in contempt of the court! Turns to the girls and randomly fires the weapon Bailiffs, help me subdue them!  
  
Heavenfury &Wolfmoon: Yeah! Both jump into the fray, pulling out their respective weapons  
  
A few minutes later it's all over. Once again there are various holes in the walls and the only thing holding up the ceiling seems to an act of God. (don't mean to offend anyone, just an expression) The fangirls are tied in groups of five. Kurama is tied up in another corner to keep him from bolting in sheer panic.  
  
Plum: Now that you've destroyed my courtroom-  
  
Kitty: YOU destroyed your courtroom!!  
  
Plum: clears throat Now that you've destroyed my courtroom, I shall have you harsher punishments than I would have originally. You five points to first group are going serve five years as the personal servants of my friends and myself. The next group will pay for any psychological therapy that Kurama feels he needs after this. The next will pay for a complete restocking of Kurama's clothes, no matter what he wants. Your group points to Kitty will be thrown in jail, because someone has to do time for this. The last will be thrown into the Deep Dark Hole of Eternal Torture By Being Hit On By Your Worst Nightmare.  
  
Heavenfury: Pulls aside a heavy curtain, reveals a huge door, and unlocks it. The last group is shoved in and the door is closed to screams of 'not you' and 'please not him'. The others are led off to their respective fates  
  
Wolfmoon: well that's over, but what about Kurama?  
  
Kurama: Can I stay here? For some reason I feel kinda safe here.  
  
Heavenfury: Sure! And while you're here, how about you take care of Hiei for us?  
  
Kurama: Hiei? He's here?  
  
Wolfmoon: Well, yeah. Tosses the Hiei statuary to Kurama Here you go!  
  
Kurama: All of a sudden, I feel a little less safe.  
  
Okay, that's it. The ispiration is being eaten up by Chemistry, I swear! That's gotta be it! So anyway, I'll introduce the next case in the next chapter...as soon as I come up with another one, that is. Oh well, see y'all later! 


End file.
